Shane Mehling

The intro is long. Nearly 50 seconds without tipping its hand. A new band should be terrified to open a record like this, worried that potential listeners will get bored with a lone ride cymbal and high, jangly guitar chord. And it’s certainly not something a discerning producer is going to throw on the radio. But then comes that growl—Are you reeeeeaaaady?!—and you hear a musical revolution being born… Which then died, less than a decade later.

I could have done this forever. This is maybe the fifth band photo I’ve reviewed, and looking back they are not getting any less dumb. But this is my final review because, honestly, most people dealing with band photos are damned from the beginning.

Infernus
Infernal Affairs
dB Rating: 8/10

Okay, so get this — I had already decided to review this photo, right there sitting in the queue, and then I see him — I see former Queensryche/current be-haircutted frontman of Operation: Mindcrime Geoff Tate crossing the street in downtown Seattle. 

Force Rise the Sun
Black hole fun
dB Rating: 8/10

There are some diverse affectations in this photo; let’s talk about them. 

I was planning on only reviewing this band’s photo, but the image came with the rest of that nonsense on the side, and I can’t just move on without saying a little about the moniker Cry Excess. 

I’ve never heard this band’s music. I don’t know when their record is coming out and I was able to even avoid their name. All I know about these fellas is that they chose to take this picture. This, out of everything they could have done, is what they decided on. 

I am gobsmacked that I’m being asked to defend Obituary’s World Demise, a record that, in my mind, is nothing less than a classic extreme metal record which I assumed was pretty much universally respected.

Varg Vikernes, a 42-year-old father of three who lives in France, is only interested in one simple thing: Never shutting the fuck up. At least that seems to be what his Youtube channel is trying to prove. Burzum would’ve released roughly ten additional records about Orcs if Vikernes spent a little more time with his Casio…

I hate studio reports because I get to hear about music instead of the actual music. Like yeah, it’s great you’re doing something but I need that goodness hurled into my sound pits right now. But we should all be willing to wait for something like Drugs of Faith, the grind and roll three-piece led by…

Something very radical has been brewing for a while to help someone in need and preserve another’s memory. Horror author/metalhead Dustin LaValley has been suffering from life-threatening Crohn’s/IBD issues while Metal Maniacs cofounder/former editor Katherine Ludwig lost her battle with non-hodgkin’s lymphoma earlier this year, leaving an irreplaceable void in the community. This inspired the…

Or is it “Tracks Premiere”? Anyway, the openly Canadian label Handshake Inc. is releasing this six-track 7″ grindstravaganza in North America on May 20th (with the impeccable, taste-for-days 7Degrees Records handling duties in every other geographic region), and both bands are wielding two songs a piece while each taking a crack at a His Hero…

The best high school house party of all time disguised as an experimental rock band, Helms Alee is trying to Kickstart funds so they can record, package and self-release their third album, Sleepwalking Sailors. But the ladies and dude are coming at it from a different angle — they’re selling you the pre-sale of their…

We’re all getting old. The bands we grew up idolizing are slowing down, retired or making geriatric mockeries of themselves. And sometimes we unfairly and harshly lash out at the newest crop of musicians for not being as heavy or “tough” as we were. I was one of those young, doe-eyed metal kids once, who…

Seattle’s brutalest, techiest, deathgrindiest band in Seattle is going on tour. Theories (feat. members of Samothrace, Skarp and Scourge Schematic) is ravaging the west as they head to and from Chaos in Tejas, creating fans from whatever audience members don’t thrash themselves to death. They start in Seattle with a set opening for demi-gods Nasum…

Destruction, legendary kings of the Teutonic thrash metal scene, are continuing to thrash ’till death with their 30th Anniversary Tour. Almost halfway through, the band plays NYC tonight and then begins a furious march as they burn through Canada towards the west coast. If you’re wondering if these guys are still doing the anti-lord’s work,…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DUi1yf97paw The biggest metal band in Israel, Orphaned Land, is being highlighted as a viable bridge between headbanging Muslims and Jews as their apolitical, peace-promoting power metal seems to only have extreme views when it comes to wearing scarves on stage. While this kind of music is definitely not the thing that blows my gentile…

All it takes is a minute and sixteen seconds for Toronto’s Greys to get your attention by effortlessly sliding a punk rock shiv into your nether regions and then clicking off another song. The Canadian trio releases EP Easy Listening on May 22, and “Post-American” is the lead-off track, a dissonant, malformed anthem that finds…

How has the internet changed metal? That’s like writing a letter that opens with “How has paper changed letter writing?” But to put a finer point on it, Metal Injection has created a just long enough mini-doc on the jaw-dropping paradigm shift in how we headbang now thanks to some nerds years ago who’d probably…

Justin Bartlett, eternal metal art badass, is going through some trying times. His 28-year-old sister Ashley was diagnosed with Stage 3 ovarian cancer on March 3rd and: On March 5th, she underwent emergency grueling surgery which seemed to last a day. Not only did the surgeons remove a 6″ and an 8″ tumor removed, they…

It’s possible Scott Kelly doesn’t sleep. Between his solo work, projects like Shrinebuilder and the untouchable legacy of Neurosis, you could rest a battleship on his laurels. But the man seems to never tire, with something new always around the bend. And to keep his fans in the loop with tours, releases and whatever else…

Back before Metallica wrung out the last of their fans accumulated goodwill with the release of KSP’s boyfriend, St. Anger, there was an idea to do something that would have either mitigated the backlash or increased it ten fold. An unnamed racing/battle game was to be released, inspired by the band, their music and, well,…

Endless excretor Dave Mustaine decided it was about time to unleash another turdlet in the punch bowl of public discourse by affirming his fuzzy knowledge of history, geography and conspiracism. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TpZzFYYWFj8&t=7m52s (If you go back a little you’ll hear the equally incredible assertion that Rick Santorum could be the next JFK.) So yes, Mustaine is…

http://vimeo.com/37255948 Andrew Bonazelli is one of those shitheads who in school would do his homework on Friday so he had his weekend free while you were happy to sweat it out until 1st Period Monday. But that sort of ridiculous work ethic is how the man can be Decibel‘s managing editor, blog guru, social media…

I bet you did not see that one coming. Ingram, who has his fingers in seemingly every Kansas pie available, worked with hardcourt bike polo equipment makers Fixcraft to design and market this ball because, we assume, he plays hardcourt bike polo. Personally I thought he just liked smoking cigarettes, putting band names on pocket…

I haven’t kept up recently on where urban black metal sits in the kvlt spectrum, but these two tracks by Brooklynites Mutilation Rites sound like they were recorded in a sewer and mixed in a crematorium. This is Side B of Devoid, the 12″ EP from Forcefield Records, and shows the band throwing jagged chunks…

Peter Dolving, famed blogger, questionable haircut enthusiast and camo shorts philosopher, has un-amicably split from the band he successfully, after many failed attempts, completely destroyed. Dolving’s confirmation was cryptic, angry and brief: I am officially quitting The Haunted. After years of working with the band, I am out. I have had it. I will NOT…

Click Here To Watch The Video Who came up with this? Was it a band effort or was there one lone genius amongst you? I don’t remember how it came up, all I know is that it’s been an idea for as long as we’ve been a band. How did you pick the videos? Were…

If you didn’t know it by now, Coliseum’s Ryan Patterson is an inhuman machine that runs solely on guitar riffs and beard hair. His newish project is a throwback to the 90s hardcore scene of Louisville where sweat flowed like beer and beer pretty much stayed in the fridges at the convenience store. Joined by…