For Those About to Squawk: Cannabis Corpse, Paradise Lost, Caligula’s Horse

Well, here we go again guys… We’ll get through this week, but there will be new releases from the Unsane AND Loincloth this month, so it’s shaping up to be a good one.

Cannabis Corpse, the super stoned, are back at it again with Left Hand Pass on Season Of Mist. If you don’t know about this band, the name kinda says it all. This is American death metal with weed puns, and you all know your boy Waldo LOVES a good pun. As previously stated, this is death metal, pure death metal with tongue in beak song titles (they’ve outdone themselves with the Nile reference here, “Papyrus Containing the Spell to Protect Its Possessor Against Attacks From He Who Is In the Bong Water”). The music here is tough, aggressive and catchy. They’ve really got something on this one. The previous releases had their moments, but LHP is solid all of the way though. “In Battle There Is No Pot” and “Chronic Breed” really stick out here as shining moments, but this band just gets better with age. This is good. If you like metal and weed and are left handed, this one is for you. 7 Fucking Pecks.

The very underrated Paradise Lost are releasing their 14th effort, Medusa, on Nuclear Blast. It’s pretty refreshing to see a band that has been around this long still putting out relevant material. This is death, for sure, but doom and some gothic mixed in, and Medusa sums that up brilliantly. This is heavy, brooding, beautiful and… nasty, all at once. It’s really hard to pick a high point of a band that has 14 pecking releases, but Medusa will be up there as it’s got a “fresh” feeling that a lot of their contemporaries can’t seem to pull off. This is most definitely their heaviest since Gothic. Peck this bad boy out. 7 Fucking Pecks.

Caligula’s Horse has a record called In Contact coming out. I didn’t know progressive metal was still a thing. Well… it is. Let’s ignore the stupid name (like, what’s the deal with Caligula’s Horse? Why is it important enough to name a band after?) and get on with the music. This is progressive metal, and not heavy in the least. It has NO teeth whatsoever, and guess what? The dudes can play… at least there’s some semblance of songwriting here and not just virtuoso wankery, but this comes across as just lame. This is rock music at best and to call it metal is a little insulting. I don’t like it, or maybe just don’t get it. Either way: 2 Fucking Pecks.

See you fools next time… Waldo, out!