Shrieks and Geeks
It’s time to ring in the new year with another hall of fame video, this one directed by Rob Zombie. Okay, wait, I seem to have gotten my wires crossed here. This is Jon Zombie, a man who… come on, seriously? Jon Zombie? Is that really the best you could do? But anyways, let’s get to the stars of this show- Defiler, a band started by your little brothers who you hope are just going through a phase.

Zombie helped these guys produce a video for their deathcore song “Cryomancer.” Now Cryomancers are an outworld race of which the Mortal Kombat fighter Sub-Zero is a descendent. But here it may refer to the opening line, a lyric that in no way speaks to the wounded jock headbanger assholes who support blind misogyny: “I wanna see you cry, bitch.” But then again, maybe it does refer to Sub-Zero, because this band is comprised completely of teenage nerds.

The frowny, terribly awkward singer is the growling embodiment of the pimply-faced teen. It’s like a Noxzema commercial with breakdowns and a little dose of Crabcore while the band leapfrogs around next to fence. There are also a couple of ladies (neither of these women are seen crying so I guess this is a cliffhanger), a burning love letter and some scenes of smoking. That’s right, pussies, this guy doesn’t give a fuck. He’s destined to be the Deathcore king, reigning over the entirety of flavor country.

But while the zits, nonsensical storyline and deplorable, brand X music all make this one hell of a journey, the real payoff comes at the end when we learn the mystery of the shirt. In an unconventional turn, no members are wearing band shirts except for the singer, who’s sporting this cartoon drawing of a goateed head. It’s an odd aesthetic and really seems out of place until the music fades, we take a breath and then realize the face is that of Mr. Jon Zombie himself. It’s a wonderful surprise and really brings the whole thing full circle. And since I’m always looking for talented producers to work with, I was inspired to check out some of the man’s finer video work. So everyone, I give you the photoshoot for “Drippin’.”