The Varg Vikernes Spring Collection is Here!

By: Shawn Macomber Posted in: featured, pic of the day, stupid crap On: Monday, April 16th, 2012


Look, as regular viewers of Project Runway and The Rachel Zoe Project already well and truly understand, there is a fine line between embodying haute couture and becoming, in the immortal words of Tim Gunn, “a pterodactyl out of a gay Jurassic Park.” In Varg Vikernes’ promo shoot for the upcoming (actually quite excellent!) third post-prison Burzum joint Umskiptar, the artist formerly known as Count Grishnackh dances a lot closer to the latter than you’d presume a pagan Odinist would prefer to. Vikernes, in all likelihood, would greatly benefit from Brad Goreski’s Born to be Brad or a season of What Not to Wear. Alas, even if we forwarded him copies of both he’d probably label the gift — much like the 2011 Breivik massacre — part of a Jewish conspiracy and turn the package to aske faster than you can say dunkelheit.

Then again, perhaps Vikernes is just playing with expectations and kitsch here. I’ve interlaced a few pictures from my recent visit to the Norway Pavilion of Epcot Center’s World Showcase to allow Decibel readers to make up their own minds on that point. Also, if you want to read about young Varg eating ice cream in chainmail, buy our special Black Metal issue. Finally, because every runway show needs a thumpin’ soundtrack, I’m embedding the Metal Inquisition Varg/Andrew W.K. mash-up. The red carpet begins after the jump…

  • Andrew Scott Thomas

    I want that troll statue!!!!

  • lulzandlulz

    Cheesy and stupid, just like him…

  • amelia

    That chainmaille look worked REALLY well for him back when he was younger, but now…..

  • purefuckingsadness

    just when you think it can’t get more pathetic….

  • dieboervakansie

    Virkernes has gone completely nutz