7 Inches of Hell

Man, I love Hells Headbangers. They’re one of my favorite labels. Even when I don’t like the stuff they put out, I appreciate that someone is dedicating their time to dredging up the absolute scummiest acts from metal’s deepest cesspools. They’ve been cranking out a bunch of 7″ singles lately, and while we don’t have the space in the print edition to cover all of them, that’s what the Internet is for!
Bestial Warlust Satan’s Fist (Demo 1996)

This one is 12 inches, which means you get three songs instead of two, but who’s counting? I have to give these Aussies credit for the extremely literal cover art – that’s Satan, and there’s his fist! Presumably demos for their never-recorded third album, if you’re into blackened death metal delivered by guys called “Marcus Hellcunt,” “Joe Skullfucker,” and “Damon Bloodstorm,” this trilogy of terror will punch your goat.

Children of TechnologyMayhemic Speed Anarchy

Band name is ironic, but the title is right on the money – the only technology that these punks use is whatever they can scrounge up in the industrial-park-and-junkyard version of the postapocalypse that they’ve turned into their personal skate ramp. A-side contains the Engrish-infused title track, b-side an obscure 80s Swedish hardcore cover – combined with a logo design straight off of a Sega Genesis game, what more do you want?

Hic IacetProphecy of Doom

Each side consists of a separate “ritual” (creative!), which basically boils down to echoing black metal, presumably recorded in Baphomet’s bathroom or something. Points for general creepiness, but you don’t really need these two songs on top of the 666 hours of other stuff you have that sounds exactly like this.

Sathanas/Spawn of Satan Split

I can’t tell if that’s supposed to be Cerberus on the sleeve or Dante’s three-headed Satan, but hey, nice work re-creating the cheapo “my friend drew this with colored pencils” style popular with 80s underground metal musicians; appropriate, since that’s the epoch that both bands hail from. Spawn of Satan provide some evil thrash with that charming hollow drum sound (plus superliminal messages telling you to kill for Satan), and Sathanas go for a full on death rattle. Probably a reason they never hit it big back in the day, but hell with it.