A Billion Blackie Lawlesses, All Wanting to Fuck Like Beasts

As a jaded old man who still buys CDs, I’ve never thought much about how the youth of today kill time while ripping digital files off the information superdriveway. Well, some days you really do actually learn something new and thanks to a bit pulled together by the crack investigative journalism team over at Nerve I now know a goodly number of metal militiamen amongst that aforementioned number are hard at work trying to find a cure for that sexy tingle in their winkies that doesn’t require pretending to exfoliate in the bathroom for half an hour while mama bangs on the door and shout-asks whether they’ve got a job yet. (Pity they who must compete with Tom G. Warrior’s cruci-dildo…) Most of the ads/self-portraits are absolutely priceless and well worth the click.

“I’m free most of the time.”

No doubt, friend!

Thanks for the tipoff, Elise/ReigninBlonde!