Plop Culture Dumps o’ the Day: Taylor Momsen, Tom Cruise

Perhaps said it best with the headline And Satan Just Became Celibate. Taylor Momsen, she of The Grinch that Stole Christmas, Gossip Girl, and The Pretty Reckless, um, fame, performed over the weekend in Toronto in an I Fuck For Satan shirt. We’re pretty sure Satan doesn’t want anything to do with Little Miss Momsen’s 17-year-old jailbait ass. In fact, we’re willing to bet even Marilyn Manson wouldn’t want a piece. Good for Momsen exploring her rebellious side and all, but put it away, child, before you become the new face of Valtrex.
In other news sure to make your genitals shriek, Tom Cruise is playing headbanger Stacee Jaxx in the movie adaptation of the Broadway musical Rock of Ages.

He’ll reportedly be singing the 80s hair metal hits himself — no rocker doubles for this guy. Countdown until he pulls a goddamn Gwyneth Paltrow and starts thinking he’s the new Steve Perry, gets a guest spot on Glee, and winds up on the Deciblog wearing an I Fuck For Satan shirt.